This week’s attempt to be funny on Twitter from 3/29 to 4/5 (posted in order of Tweets). I spent most of my time during this period in Austin, TX for the American Atheists Convention (#AACON13), so I was pretty much ignoring social media. I bought a new camera so I could take pictures and never used it once.
3/30
OMG, DJ is playing Dougie Fresh & Slick Rick! I just had an 80’s orgasm!
3/31
So did Jesus see his shadow this morning?
4/1
It smells like bat shit. Wait… what’s that chirping sound?
Just crushed this fool who wanted to tell us about Jesus. Boy, did you pick the wrong atheist to proselytize to!
4/3
I’ve seen horrible shit in my life but Kevin Ware’s injury made me cringe. On the bright side, he’ll rock the paralympics!
I’m hotter than Chris Lee (R-NY) at a GNC store buying Muscle Milk.
4/4
Nicolas Cage walks into an adult store. Clerk suggests a dildo he can use to “tear that vagina up.” Cage responds, “I’m more of a vagina protector.”
4/5
#BecauseOfAdamLambert I renewed my appreciation for the hatred of popism.
One more tick in the “Yep, I’m straight” column. #BecauseOfAdamLambert
#BecauseOfAdamLambert : When the Jonas Brothers meet the wardrobe of My Chemical Romance.
#BackIn7thGrade seeing it was more interesting than putting it in.
Blair Scott: Synthentral 