Music Time! 3/27/16

I’m sitting here processing new music for my library to pass the time away before the The Walking Dead starts. So here’s some “dead” music…

ARTIST: Abney Park
SONG: Dead Silence (2005 Mix)
ALBUM: Taxidermy
YEAR: 2005

ARTIST: Alien Vampires
SONG: You Wish Me Dead Get In Line
ALBUM: Drag You To Hell (Deluxe Edition)
YEAR: 2015

ARTIST: Altered Images
SONG: Dead Pop Stars
ALBUM: I Could Be Happy, The Best of Altered Images
YEAR: 1981 (song)

ARTIST: The Cure
SONG: Sleep When I’m Dead
ALBUM: 4:13 Dream
YEAR: 2008

ARTIST: XPQ-21
SONG: Dead Body
ALBUM: Alive (Limited Edition)
YEAR: 2006

ARTIST: Ladyhawke
SONG: The Quick & The Dead
ALBUM: Anxiety
YEAR: 2012

ARTIST: Oingo Boingo
SONG: Dead Man’s Party
ALBUM: Best O’ Boingo
YEAR: 1992 (album)

ARTIST: Velvet Acid Christ
SONG: Hail to the Dead Souls
ALBUM: Between The Eyes, Vol #2 1994
YEAR: 2004 (album)

ARTIST: Skinny Puppy
SONG: Dead Doll
ALBUM: Bites
YEAR: 1985

ARTIST: Signal Aout 42
SONG: Dead Is Calling
ALBUM: Contrast (Limited Edition)
YEAR: 1990

ARTIST: Stone Temple Pilots
SONG: Dead And Bloated
ALBUM: Core
YEAR: 1992

ARTIST: Lola Angst
SONG: Am I Dead?
ALBUM: The Council Of Love
YEAR: 2006

ARTIST: Bauhaus
SONG: Bela Lugosi’s Dead
ALBUM: Bela Lugosi’s Dead (12″)
YEAR: 1979

ARTIST: Stabbing Westward
SONG: When I’m Dead
ALBUM: Darkest Days
YEAR: 1998

ARTIST: Midnight Oil
SONG: The Dead Heart
ALBUM: Diesel and Dust
YEAR: 1997

ARTIST: Pixies
SONG: Dead
ALBUM: Doolittle
YEAR: 1989

ARTIST: Siouxsie And The Banshees
SONG: Drop Dead Celebration
ALBUM: Downside Up
YEAR: 2004

ARTIST: Alphaville
SONG: Script Of A Dead Poet
ALBUM: Dreamscapes (Limited Edition Box Set)
YEAR: 1999

ARTIST: Combichrist
SONG: From My Cold Dead Hands (Ginger Fish Remix)
ALBUM: Electrostorm Vol.6
YEAR: 2015

ARTIST: CHVRCHES
SONG: Playing Dead
ALBUM: Every Open Eye (Deluxe Edition)
YEAR: 2015

ARTIST: Funker Vogt
SONG: The Voice of the Dead
ALBUM: Execution Tracks
YEAR: 1998

ARTIST: They Might Be Giants
SONG: Exquisite Dead Guy
ALBUM: Factory Showroom
YEAR: 1996

ARTIST: Faderhead
SONG: Another Dead Boy
ALBUM: FH3
YEAR: 2008

ARTIST: Letters to Cleo
SONG: Find You Dead
ALBUM: Go!
YEAR: 1997

ARTIST: Bad Religion
SONG: Pity the Dead
ALBUM: The Gray Race
YEAR: 1996

BWAHAHA 7/18 – 11/20

BWAHAHA (Blair’s Week Attempts at Haha’s) 7/18 – 11/20: Boy am I waaaaaaaaaay behind! A lot’s happened since my last BWAHAHA. I moved to Austin, TX. I eliminated stress in my life and made a lot of life changes in order to be happy before I die. This means I’ve added a few things to my bucket list. Prior to this, I had done everything on my bucket list. The only thing left to add was make-believe shit and crimes. But now that I’m like stress free and really happy with my life, there’s new shit I gotta try! Wish me luck!

What else? I got to see the Psychedelic Furs live! What an amazing show. It was also the first concert that Suzie and I have been to where we weren’t the oldest people there! Also got to finally see Mr. Kitty, who puts on one helluva an enthusiastic performance. He hugged me after the show, so scratch that one off my new happy bucket list!

OTHER STUFF

• Watching Doomsday Preppers for shits & giggles. Some stuff to learn, but really love how NatGeo calls ’em out on their BS on the screen.
• In my back yard yelling at the bats, “Eat them fucking skeeters! Eat ’em!”

• 

  And then Date Night took a turn for the worse.

• Watching “An Honest Liar” with Suzie​ (doc about The Amazing Randi) and we saw me. That was really cool!
• My car is in The Chive today! Check out #19 on “That’ll Buff Out.”

• 

  Ha! Fooled you USPS! My package of cocaine arrived from China! Just kidding USPS! No, seriously, just kidding.

• Teaching Suzie​ to play Skyrim was an adventure. Watching her play… well, let’s just say my stamina and patience bars ran dry.
• I can’t wait until Obama’s fifth term when he FINALLY takes everyone’s guns, makes abortions mandatory, and outlaws Christianity!
• Upstairs bathroom has a line of thirty people. I go downstairs. Only one in the bathroom. #Sheeple
• @StateFarm asked me, “What kind of cake will they serve at your retirement?”
  • I’m pretty sure it’ll be a funeral cake. #LifeGoals
• If you’re a bad dancer, just go to a Charismatic Church to dance: no one will notice how bad you are. #Camouflage
• Never forget 911! It saves lives. Operators are standing by!
• The irony of 9/11 Truthers is that they’re not.
• Amazing how passive aggressive yard sale shoppers are. It’s $.50. Just buy the damn thing. LOL

• 

  I can’t tell if this $5 was the victim of a violent crime, strip club, or Bronies.

• The problem with listening to Industrial Music is having to constantly turn the radio off. Is that weird sound on the CD or your car?

• 

  I made this to reflect my vision of America! WOOT!

• All future Presidential debates should not just have a moderator, but a fact-checker, who instantly calls candidates out on lies & bullshit.
• My typehoes have ingreased exponinshooly as the peace of glaz stuck in my indicks fingrrrr gets moar and moar infecktid.
• I shall power wash my sidewalk in the rain. That way I won’t notice the power washer is soaking me.

• 

  Wait, Woolworth’s still exists?

• 

  Can we just let the apocalypse happen now and end the stupid?

• I find it amusing that the Alabama Beverage Control has recipes on its web page and price list for stores. #StateSupportOfAlcoholism
• Woman in line has clearly Googled herself to “expert” on Alzheimers and Dementia. Problem is, she’s completely full of shit.
• We’ve all encountered this idiot in parking lots. Don’t be this idiot.
• I learned today that the Japanese have a term similar to the American “Butterface:” Bakku-shan (pretty behind but not front) #ShallowWorld
• You’d think that almost 45 years on the planet I’d have this pancake flipping thing down. Nope. I eat pancake-like bites. #DoingitWrong
• At the Chinese Buffet my Godzilla roar ring tone sounds. Table next to me loses it laughing so hard. Racists; Godzilla was Japanese!
• Damn, I think I put too much alcohol in the praline milkshake… nope… no I didn’t. Any amount is just right. #PreDebateDrinking
• Just saw someone spell chasin’ as chasen. Awww, isn’t Alabama education so cute!
• Dear creators of The Flash… visitation phones in prisons are recorded. The DOC knows who The Flash is.
• The news reporting that a 3.5 occurred in California is like the news reporting that it rained in the Rain Forest. #SlowNewsDay
• Overheard at Kroger, “Remember spitting the seeds out? Now watermelon is seedless. That’s unnatural.” #TheStupidItHurts
• That might have been the fakest polite customer service rep I’ve ever talked to.

• 

  6’2 fat man sleeping in a 4′ Budget rental truck. Oh happy, happy, joy, joy! Goodnight.

• Hello Austin! I’m here. First up, Whataburger!
• Having a Whataburger two miles from the apartment may become problematic. #FirstWorldProblems #Austin

• 

  Uh-oh, look what I found! One more reason to love #Austin!

• CVS Rep: What’s your birthday?, Me: 3/12/71, CVS Rep: 1971?, Me: Umm…..

• 

  Wanna impress your girl? Rent out the entire theater. Or go to a movie no one else wants to see.

• The beginning of The Last Witch Hunter is scenes from The Lord of the Rings. Then you see a massive Groot.
• Staff, “Would you like a complimentary Miller Lite?”
  • Me, “No thanks.”
  • GF, “Why not?
  • Me, “Free isn’t always good.”
• Next time you make a cappuccino at home, add a teaspoon of Swiss Miss hot chocolate to it. BAM! You’re welcome.

• 

  Who’s the butthead who painted all the curb stops the same color as handicap parking?

• What on earth is that yippy little fucking dog barking at all day? Is it a illegal to slip valium into the neighbor’s dog’s food?

• 

  Finally! A Saint Candle I can fully endorse! Thanks to the Smoking Caterpillar on 6th St. #Austin #CharlesDarwin

• The Internet is abuzz about aliens out west because the Internet is too stupid to use Google for 2 minutes to learn it’s just a rocket. SMH
• Is there a point where Thea Queen dies so she’ll stop being such an annoying character? #Arrow
• When in uniform and someone wished me a Happy Veteran’s Day, I’d respond, “It’s Veteran’s Day not Active Duty Day. Go thank a homeless vet.”

• 

  We do what we want. This is Texas. Gummit’ can’t tell me what to do no more!

• THE REFUGEE SITUATION:
  • Remember that time we refused to let the Irish in because of the chance one of them might be an IRA member? Fun times, right?
  • Remember that time the Colonies refused to allow any ships come in from England because one of the passengers might be a British spy? No?
  • Remember when we refused to allow refugees from Kosovo, Yugoslavia, and Macedonia in because one might be a bad person? Those were the days!
  • Remember that time we locked up all the Japanese citizens for fear of one being a spy? Oh wait… we actually did that shit. Never mind.
  • Remember all those Russian refugees and asylum seekers we denied entry because one might be a legit communist or Russian spy? No?
  • Remember all the dangerous Nazis we kept out, refusing to let them be part of the USA and we made sure they didn’t’ touch our space program?
  • Remember when we refused to pick up Vietnamese refugees at the embassy during the evacuation of Vietnam because one might be a commie?
  • Not allowing 10,000 refugees in as one might be a terrorist is like not having sex with 10,000 women as one might have an STD. #TerrorCondom

140 CHARACTER ASSASSINATIONS

• I think I’ll use my juicer to make a green juice of water hemlock, white snakeroot, and belladonna. #AllNatural #GreenLife #Organic
• The problem with having sex with Irish women is you can’t tell if you had sex because of your pickup skills or a bit o’ luck.
• The problem with having sex with American women is that they all think they’re #1 even though world travelers know otherwise.
• The problem with having sex with Canadian women is that you have to carry an English condom and a French Tickler at all times.
• The problem with having sex with Italian women is they like their noodles to be al dente.
• The problem with having sex with Scottish women is many don’t think they’re strong enough to do the caber toss.
• The problem with having sex with Greek women is they say they like plain yogurt, but they really don’t.
• The problem with having sex with French women is they throw in the towel at the first pick up line.
• The problem with having sex with Egyptian women is they try to get you in on their pyramid scheme.
• The problem with having sex with Australian women is they make you nervous, but at least take you in and feed you breakfast.
• The problem with having sex with South African women is they give preference to vanilla positions.
• The problem with having sex with Icelandic women is is you think they’re Swedish Chef because all they talk about is, “Bjork, Bjork, Bjork.”
• GOP DEBATE
  • So far, this feels more like a Jerry Springer show than a debate. #GOPDebate #Awkward #UnleadedACan
  • So far, there is a roughly 25% rate of actually answering the question. Masters of political avoidance answers. #GOPDebate
  • Hawk! Hawk! Hawk! Hawk! Hawk! #RepublicanMatingCall #GOPDebate
  • Scott Walker was like, “Oh shit, they asked me about #BlackLivesMatter”. Lemme give a BS answer quickly. #GOPDebate
  • Every candidate was like, “Thank God they asked the black guy the race relations question!” #GOPDebate
  • I’m greatly disappointed that FOX News did not give every candidate a chance to out-Jesus the other candidates. #GOPDebate
  • For the next question, how long would you be willing to suck Ronald Reagan ‘ dick? #GOPDebate #Reaganophilia
  • They finally asked how long each candidate would suck Reagan’s dick! #GOPDebate #Reaganophilia
• Just seen: open top Jeep, large Confederate flag on PVC, John Deere hat on driver, blaring country music. #StereotypesAreReal
• I hate chasing girls. I’d rather they just come to me. #TropicalStormEricka
• I see stores are already putting up Happy Halloween signs. The War on Samhain continues! #ThereIsNoWarOnHolidays
• FACEBOOK DOWN, POLITICS STYLE:
  • #FacebookDown is an inside job! #NeverForget928 #FacebookTruthers
  • “Don’t blame me for Facebook being down, I’m not in charge of that company!” – Carly Fiorina #FacebookDown
  • “We’ve heard about this #FacebookDown thing. Lots of people talking about it. We’re going to look into it. Build a wall.” – Donald Trump
  • “All those anti Kim Davis memes and gay pride profile pictures has led to #FacebookDown! Praise the White Jesus!” – Mike Huckabee
  • “Oh my bad, did I plan construction on the Facebook network today without notifying Facebook?” – Chris Christie #FacebookDown
  • “#FacebookDown is another piece of evidence pointing to why I’ll bomb Syria if elected.” – Lindsey Graham
  • “I’m not #FacebookDown. I’ve never been, I don’t associate with it, and I don’t approve of that lifestyle because of the Bible.” – Ted Cruz
  • “#FacebookDown is a complete coincidence to my personal email server being down at the same time.” – Hillary Clinton
• THE WALKING DEAD:
  • Heard of that new horror movie, The Barber of Alexandria? #TWD #DeadBuzz #TalkingDead
  • At this pace there won’t be any original Alexandrians left for Rick’s to kill. #TWD #DeadBuzz #TalkingDead
  • I don’t think they have Herd Immunity. #TWD #DeadBuzz #TalkingDead #ScienceJoke
  • Darth Vader is watching #TWD and was like, “Nooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo!” #DeadBuzz #TalkingDead
  • Zombies be like, “Mmm, Korean buffet!” #TWD #DeadBuzz #TalkingDead
  • When is Morgan going to do the Crane Kick during his Karate Kid training montage? #TWD #DeadBuzz #TalkingDead
• INJURE A FILM:
  • Citizen Cane #InjureAFilm
  • Lawrence of Arabies #InjureAFilm
  • Star Warts #InjureAFilm
  • Apoxalypse Now #InjureAFilm
  • Ataxia Driver #InjureAFilm
  • The Sound of Bruises #InjureAFilm
  • S*M*A*S*H #InjureAFilm
  • Close Encounters of the Third Degree Burn #InjureAFilm
  • Forrest Gimp #InjureAFilm
  • Ben-Hurt #InjureAFilm
  • Dances With Lupus #InjureAFilm
  • A Place in the Sunburn #InjureAFilm
  • E.T. The Extra Terroristrial #InjureAFilm

@MIDNIGHT HASHTAG WARS

• Oh shit, the Condom broke! #ScaryStoryIn5Words @midnight
• Are your parents having sex? #ScaryStoryIn5Words @midnight
• Jar-Jar appears in Force Awakens #ScaryStoryIn5Words #StarWars @midnight

CAPTION CENTRAL

• 

  Always be aware of your surroundings.

• 

• 

  This might very well be the loneliest picture I’ve ever seen.

• 

  “Hey, y’all gonna still cut my hair, or what?”

• 

  There’s Sea Doo… then there’s Sea Don’t.

• 

  Meanwhile in South Carolina…

• 

  When you run out of communion wafers and realize Cheetos are a great substitute for transubstantiation.

• 

  “We count only blue cars. Skip the cracks in the street and ask many questions, like children often do.”

• 

  Can we just start the apocalypse today and end the epidemic of human stupidity?

• 

BWAHAHA 3/28 – 4/3

BWAHAHA (Blair’s Week Attempts at Haha’s) 3/28 – 4/3: Okay, so this is almost a week overdue. Fuckin’ sue me, I was busy!

No funny in this paragraph today: this is a serious issue. I think it’s safe to say that the Spring Severe Storm Season (S4) has officially kicked off. While technology allows us to watch chases live in areas we do not live in or can’t get to, there *may* also be some drawbacks to that new technology. It was recently reported that residents of a town affected by severe weather could not get good cell signals because all the bandwidth was being used up. While there is no concrete evidence that chasers were using it all up, there is no doubt that there were dozens of live streaming chasers in the area and dozens more using cell networks to download radar, etc. This is an issue the storm chasing community at large is going to have to address at some point. When does streaming cross the line from safety and information into harming the community instead? When a community can no longer communicate with emergency personnel or get their own weather reports so they know when to take shelter, is that not harming rather than helping? This is likely never going to be an issue if you are chasing in large cities like Oklahoma City (unless cell towers are taken down by storms) or in areas where chasers don’t normally appear in droves (like here in Alabama). However, if you’re in little bitty Edna… maybe you should think twice about streaming until you run across something that needs to be streamed for public safety purposes (such as an active wall cloud or tornado).

OTHER STUFF:

• 

  When the lightning is really close and suddenly it’s high noon at 2100.

• Just saw my first chipmunk in the yard this season! I wonder how long before the cats kill it.
• Experimenting with green chile meatloaf… we’ll know if I’m an idiot or genius in about an hour.
• If you see dozens of chasers converge on your town during a storm and your tornado sirens aren’t going off, you should probably check.
• Flying rock on the interstate hit one of my AcuRite wind cups and broke it, so the loss of balance shredded the remaining two. ‪#‎Bummed‬

• 

  How come they always hit my house when I’m not at my house? ‪#‎FirstWorldChaserProblems‬

140 CHARACTER ASSASSINATIONS:

• Guess I didn’t need the kleenex after all. ‪#‎TheWalkingDead‬ ‪#‎DeadBuzz‬
• So what is Morgan, Mr “All life is precious,” thinking walking into an execution? ‪#‎TheWalkingDead‬ ‪#‎DeadBuzz‬

BWAHAHA 2/21 – 2/27

BWAHAHA (Blair’s Week Attempts at Haha’s) 2/21 – 2/27: I guess all that panic was worth it since Snowmageddon actually happened here in Alabama. Average snowfall for my area was 7.75″ with some places reporting over 9″. In my backyard we got 7.67″ (based on the average of five measurements on a large flat non-grass & non-concrete surface). That’s a lot of snow for Alabama. Our personal record at our house was 11.96″ back in 2011. The record for Huntsville was set in the 60’s at 17.1″. Craziness!!!! I’ll put up a blog entry for my storm chasing that day. And now we’ll likely get some more ice and snow this coming Wednesday and Thursday. Well, I guess we had it coming since we started issuing gay marriage licenses. <evil grin>

This week brought me a ray of happiness and sunshine as Jimmy did this on his show. One of the things that pisses me off the most is anti-vaxxers who espouse their ignorance every day and cause more and more people to fall for their claptrap, thus reducing herd immunity and bringing back diseases we had practically eliminated thanks to vaccines. So to see this on a mainstream show put a giant grin on my face. Way to go Jimmy!!!!

Then I found this gem. I don’t know how I missed this back in 2008, but I’m happy I found it today.

OTHER STUFF:

• This storm is taking forever to get here. From 0300 to 0900 and now extended again. If it sits over us as long as it sat over Texas, we could see inches on the higher side of the “possible.” Or it’ll just fucking rain.

• 

  C’mon… you can do it! C’mon! C’mon! C’mon! My laughter will be covering up tears if it just frickin’ rains here.

• If you work out of the home, a “snow day” don’t mean a damn thing. Enjoy your day off assholes! ;)
• A lot of people are talking about their sexual exploits from last night on social media. We don’t care how many inches you got last night!
• “I’ve noticed that about your people, Doctor. You find it easier to understand the death of one than the death of a million.” ‪#‎RIPSpock

140 CHARACTER ASSASSINATIONS:

• Momma said knock you out, Rick gonna knock you out! ‪#‎TWD‬ ‪#‎TheWalkingDead‬ ‪#‎deadbuzz‬

• 

  Wait… now I’m confused, is the ISIS Flag black and white or gold and blue? #TheDress

• 

  Look at these gold-colored starving children! ‪#‎TheDress‬

@MIDNIGHT #HASHTAGWARS:

• Playing Chicken With Doing Dishes ‪#‎RoommatesIn5Words‬ @midnight
• Oh, rents due? My bad. ‪#‎RoommatesIn5Words‬ @midnight
• What is that fucking smell? ‪#‎RoommatesIn5Words‬ @midnight

CAPTION CENTRAL:

• 

  That’s the appropriate level of security for those toys.

• 

  Oh look, the bathroom comes with an atheist baby changing station! (Mmm… BBQ baby!)

• 

  It’s cool ’til a drunk person stumbles and impales themselves. Of course, if it’s a good party, no one will notice.

BWAHAHA 2/14 – 2/20

BWAHAHA (Blair’s Week Attempts at Haha’s) 2/14 – 2/20: Alabama and some other parts of the South got dumped on this week a couple of times. Cities shut down as Snowmageddon started and the Snowpocalypse began. Sure, we give the South shit for it, but to be fair, there’s no reason for them to invest in the resources to deal with the snow that occurs rarely down here. It would just be a waste of tax dollars. So enjoy your snow day at home. Well, unless you’re like me and work at home, which means you never get a snow day – it just means you have to deal with everyone else being at home with you when you’re normally by yourself. I’ll put up a separate blog entry with all the snow pictures and videos of the roads, etc.

Valentine’s Day happened, as it always does. I’m not a fan of Valentine’s Day for many reasons and I was worried about having to go through the crap this year since this is Suzie and I’s first Valentine’s Day together. But nope, Suzie is amazing and all we did was have a nice dinner at home: steak and crab legs. Well, she ate the crab legs, because the only seafood I like is hushpuppies.

OTHER STUFF:

• 

  #‎TheWalkingDead‬ ‪#‎Skyrim‬ ‪#‎Mashup‬

• I love you the same today as I did yesterday, but apparently I’m supposed to love you more for 24 hours because today everyone has VD.
• The combination of payday, Valentine’s Day, and the coming Snowpocalypse made the stores a madhouse today. I’ll go grocery shopping later.

• 

  So it’s going to be one of those days, huh?

• Finishing out Valentine’s by watching UFC with my honey. One more reason to love her.

• 

  Valentine’s dinner. Giant steak for me and crab legs for her. After careful deliberation, I decided to go with the Brontosaurus steak.

• To warm me up, a big bowl of grits, with cayenne added for extra warmth. At least one thing the South got right.

• 

  Kitty doesn’t like the snow. Lemme in!

• Had to pick up Suzie because she didn’t want to drive in this mess. So I get to instead. To be fair, I love driving in it.

• 

  “It’s so fluffy I could die!” ‪#‎alwx‬

140 CHARACTER ASSASSINATIONS:

• Zombiepocalypse Tip: the rabies virus will die when cooking meat. Mmm, BBQ dog. ‪#‎TheWalkingDead‬ ‪#‎TWD‬
• The narwhal song just reminds me to not use Sprint. ‪#‎AdvertisingFail‬