BWAHAHA (Blair’s Week Attempts at Haha’s) 9/13 – 9/19: This was a pretty boring week overall. Slow work. Slow days. Slow weather. Slowly rebuilding my levels in Skyrim after I accidentally deleted my level 80 Argonian. I’m actually putting this together at 1:30 in the morning Thursday night/Friday morning because on Friday afternoon my girlfriend and I are heading to Rock Island State Park to enjoy the trails and waterfalls. It’s always nice to get away. Thanks to a friend (you know who you are) for staying in our house for us. We clean up our wet spots, so please clean up yours. Thanks!
I’m no longer hyperlinking the hashtags and Twitter accounts I reference. Copy & paste you lazy bastards. (Yes, I know… I’m a lazy bastard as well.)
OTHER STUFF
Just passed an 80+ yo female Asian driver doing 20 under the speed limit in a handicap-tagged Lotus. I should play the lottery today.
How to tell Macaroni Grill isn’t a real Italian restaurant: They’re using a parody of Sir Mix-A-Lot’s ‘Baby Got Back’ to promote flatbread.
Dear Mother Nature: You’ve ignored me now for almost two weeks. Please send storms. I’m bored. Storm Chasing Cabin Fever! Thanks! Love ‘ya!
140 CHARACTER ASSASSINATIONS
The Best of the Vest #HipsterComicBooks @midnight
Archiecrombie & Fitch #HipsterComicBooks @midnight
Cavewoman: Missing Ink #HipsterComicBooks @midnight
Atom the Catatonic #HipsterComicBooks @midnight
Black Furry #HipsterComicBooks @midnight
Bullwinkle & Rocky Shores #HipsterComicBooks @midnight
Danny Blazer & Corduroy #HipsterComicBooks @midnight
The Beach House of Yang #HipsterComicBooks @midnight
Catwoman/Vampirella Weekend: The Furies #HipsterComicBooks @midnight
Batman: Through the Cooking Class #HipsterComicBooks @midnight
Silver Age: Going Green With Lanterns #HipsterComicBooks @midnight
Rudolph the Red-Nosed Pabst Beer Drinker #HipsterComicBooks @midnight (Yes, Rudolph had his own comic book)
Judge Dredding the Day #HipsterComicBooks @midnight
Lobo Goes to Hollister #HipsterComicBooks @midnight
Samurai Jack Kerouac #HipsterComicBooks @midnight
The Further Adventures of Indiemusic Tones #HipsterComicBooks @midnight
My Namedropping is Chaos #HipsterComicBooks @midnight
George of the Jungle Washington #RuinAPresident @midnight
Thomas Jefferson’s Moving On Up #RuinAPresident @midnight
John Quincy Adams, Medical Examiner #RuinAPresident @midnight
John Tyler Perry’s Diary of a Mad White President #RuinAPresident @midnight
Abraham Lincoln Logs #RuinAPresident @midnight
In modern times it would be Abraham Lincoln Blogs
Private Benjamin Harrison #RuinAPresident @midnight
Theodora Roosevelvet #RuinAPresident @midnight
Franklin “The Big D” Roosevelt #RuinAPresident @midnight
Harry Truman Show #RuinAPresident @midnight
Jimmy Welcome Back Carter #RuinAPresident @midnight
Ronald Regan MacNeil #RuinAPresident @midnight #Exorcist
George H. We Got Bush #RuinAPresident @midnight #RevengeOfTheNerdsQuotes
Bill Ha Ha Clinton-Dix #RuinAPresident @midnight #GreenBayPackers
Charles, You’ve Got Some Gall! #RuinAPresident @midnight #GoingFrench
Saint Nicolas Sarkozy #RuinAPresident #GoingFrench @midnight
Nelson Played the Mandolin #RuinAPresident #CivilRights @midnight
Boris the Soviet Love Hammer Yeltsin #RuinAPresident @midnight
Vladimir The Impaler Putin #RuinAPresident @midnight
The Lone Planker #PirateTVShows @midnight
What’s Me Line, Matey? #PirateTVShows @midnight
Deckgunsmoke #PirateTVShows @midnight
Have Rum, Will Travel #PirateTVShows @midnight
Leave It to Deck Fever #PirateTVShows @midnight
Davey Jones and Goliath #PirateTVShows @midnight
The Jolly Roy Rogers Show #PirateTVShows @midnight
The Red Skeleton Show #PirateTVShows @midnight
Captain Kidd Kangaroo #PirateTVShows @midnight
The Sea Stooges Show #PirateTVShows @midnight
Cap’n Knows Best #PirateTVShows @midnight
Neat the Tress #PirateTVShows @midnight
Rawhide the Treasure #PirateTVShows @midnight
Days of our Knives #PirateTVShows @midnight
The Beverly Swillbillies #PirateTVShows @midnight
Kill Again’s Island #PirateTVShows @midnight
The Flintlockstones #PirateTVShows @midnight
My Three Guns #PirateTVShows @midnight
Mister Jolly Rogers’ Neighborhood #PirateTVShows @midnight
The Sea Monkees #PirateTVShows @midnight
Saturday Deck Fight Live #PirateTVShows @midnight
Knots Banding #PirateTVShows @midnight
M*A*S*H for Dinner (Again) #PirateTVShows @midnight
Ship’s Wheel of Fortune #PirateTVShows @midnight
Starsky And Dutch East India Company #PirateTVShows @midnight
The Poppet Show #PirateTVShows @midnight
The Golden Pearls #PirateTVShows @midnight
Ferried… With Children #PirateTVShows @midnight
Sails from the Crypt #PirateTVShows @midnight
Water Taxi #PirateTVShows @midnight
Mystery Pirate Theater 1700 #PirateTVShows @midnight
CAPTION CENTRAL
Beware the Chihuabber.
You realize, after posting on social media, that your friend’s armpit makes it look like you’re naked.
Now all the Christians can stop asking me if I’ve found him, because I FOUND HIM!
Clearly huge fans of The Sound of Music.
Blair Scott: Synthentral 