BWAHAHA: 8/30 – 9/5

BWAHAHA (Blair’s Week Attempts at Haha’s) 8/30 – 9/5: This was one of those weeks where work was driving me crazy. Hey, let’s take a facility contract that’s been on hold for almost two years and roll it out in two weeks! Wait, you mean I essentially have two weeks to get over a month’s amount of work done? Oh, and then you’re gonna go apeshit when you find out two days before the install that stuff’s not done? Well gosh, maybe you shoulda fuckin’ thunk that shit through beforehand!

But at least I got to chase a few storms this week and ended the weekend with friends at a wedding. While that’s great for my friends who got married, my girlfriend and I both looked at each other with the “nope, never” eyes. And that’s why I love her!

OTHER STUFF:

Thanks to the three peeps who stopped to ask, “You okay?” while I was parked on the side of the road shooting storms. Yep, unless we’re talking about my head.

Ha ha! My magic weather bubble is working! BWAHAHA!

Ha ha! My magic weather bubble is working! BWAHAHA!

What is up with the crazy models on the new invest?

Why is Beefy Fritos Burritos so hard to say sober? Taco Bell should call them Fritorritos!

I present Exhibit A against my girlfriend’s insistence that I don’t pay attention when driving:

While my Magic Weather Bubble keeps me dry, it also keeps me from chasing storms. #ProsAndCons #Wizarding101

While my Magic Weather Bubble keeps me dry, it also keeps me from chasing storms. #ProsAndCons #Wizarding101

It's not real cooking without a fire! Turned off burner and let it burn out.

It’s not real cooking without a fire! Turned off burner and let it burn out.

Kids playing in Bicentennial Park, Nashville. #FavNashPic Wrong Nash? Nope, screw that Nash guy.

Kids playing in Bicentennial Park, Nashville. #FavNashPic
Wrong Nash? Nope, screw that Nash guy.

Seriously....

Seriously….

140 CHARACTER ASSASSINATIONS:

I can’t tell if my glasses are smudged or if I’m at a vape meet.

#facebookdown – so go ahead and reintroduce yourself to that Google+ account you never used.

I’m pretty sure #facebookdown was a Twitter conspiracy to drive traffic to Twitter.

“I’ve had so much plastic surgery, when I die they will donate my body to Tupperware.” – Joan Rivers. Tupperware is waiting. #RIPJoanRivers

CAPTION CENTRAL:

Because this is the way the school year always started when I went to school! Yeah. Right.

Because this is the way the school year always started when I went to school! Yeah. Right.

No wonder Sasquatch is always so angry in those commercials: he's a drunkard!

No wonder Sasquatch is always so angry in those commercials: he’s a drunkard!

When asked why he hit the mannequin, John replied, "I thought it was Justin Bieber."

When asked why he hit the mannequin, John replied, “I thought it was Justin Bieber.”

When otters get Ebola.

When otters get Ebola.

We really need more ATMs installed in the Death Star.

We really need more ATMs installed in the Death Star.

"OMG, I'm going to find the person who leaked my photos and beat the shit out of them with this pink baseball bat!"

“OMG, I’m going to find the person who leaked my photos and beat the shit out of them with this pink baseball bat!”

Atlanta PD will be transporting this prisoner to Block AA-23, Cell 2187.

Atlanta PD will be transporting this prisoner to Block AA-23, Cell 2187.

Ronald refused to honor the restraining order obtained by Burger King.

Ronald refused to honor the restraining order obtained by Burger King.

The set of Batman Vs Superman got a little carried away.

The set of Batman Vs Superman got a little carried away.

When taking weather photos, make sure no animals are mating in the photo. Or go out of the way to make sure they are.

When taking weather photos, make sure no animals are mating in the photo. Or go out of the way to make sure they are.

OMG! Someone built a Need for Speed road!

OMG! Someone built a Need for Speed road!

Okay McDonald's, stop giving Japan special treatment and bring this awesome to the states: especially near me.

Okay McDonald’s, stop giving Japan special treatment and bring this awesome to the states: especially near me.

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BWAHAHA: 8/16 – 8/22

BWAHAHA (Blair’s Week Attempts at Haha’s) 8/16 – 8/22: This was an interesting week. Ferguson went crazy, Barðarbunga threatened to erupt (it actually began a small eruption on 8/23), St Louis PD shot a man for stealing two sodas, the San Francisco police shot a man for not paying his bus fare, and I finally put primer on my bathroom wall! What happened to Freedom of Press in this country? Why are the police putting media in a “designated press area” when shit’s going crazy? No one puts the media in a “designated media area” in  a war zone, but when riots are breaking out, suddenly we’re concerned about the safety of the media? I call bullshit. A “designated media area” is contrary to the very idea of Freedom of Press. Yeah, I know, no humor in there, sorry.

On the bright side of this week, a few storms rolled through that were close enough for me to chase during my lunch break. Chasing is something that makes me very happy, especially when I can get out of the office for a bit to do it.

OTHER STUFF:

Always funny when the camera only captures part of the lightning. It just looks so weird. #alwx 8/17/2014 13:34:02

20140817 VidCap 001

20140818b

So True! (created by Blair Scott)

If you say “possibly” “maybe” “I wonder” or “perhaps” while on air, you’re not being a journalist, you’re being a talk show host.

20140820a

Chasemares… (created by Blair Scott)

20140820b

While chasing Monday in Huntsville, I was looking at the radar and laughing, “Oh look, there’s a hurricane just south of me.

I’ve found a few spots around here with at least a one mile unobstructed view: now if I can just get the storms to go there.

20140821g

Chasemares… (created by Blair Scott)

20140821h

Just chillin’! Drinkin’ some Windex!

20140822a

Waiting for bats in Arkansas. Wait, is my GF naked behind me? #MidnightVacation @midnight

20140822b

Perfect vacation? Chasing tornadoes in Alabama! #MidnightVacation @midnight

I just declined the #IceBucketChallenge because the ALSA only gives 27% to research. I only donate to orgs that give at least 50%. #SourPuss

140 CHARACTER ASSASSINATIONS:

There was a bug hovering above the toilet water. Was.

Ice Water Challenge for Drought Awareness #NextBigCharityChallenge @midnight

Shake Weight Challenge for Parkinson’s Disease Awareness #NextBigCharityChallenge @midnight

Hot Dog Eating Contest for Hunger Awareness #NextBigCharityChallenge @midnight

Maalox Challenge for Irritable Bowel Syndrome Awareness #NextBigCharityChallenge @midnight

Sudoku Challenge for ADHD Awareness #NextBigCharityChallenge @midnight

Black Out Drunk Challenge for Alzheimer’s Disease Awareness #NextBigCharityChallenge @midnight

Powdered White Donut Challenge for Anthrax Awareness #NextBigCharityChallenge @midnight

72oz Steak Challenge for E.Coli Awareness #NextBigCharityChallenge @midnight

Pumping Iron Competition for Hemochromatosis Awareness #NextBigCharityChallenge @midnight

Fishing Contest for Hookworm Awareness #NextBigCharityChallenge @midnight

Suzanne Somers Thigh Master Competition for PID (Pelvic Inflammatory Disease) Awareness #NextBigCharityChallenge @midnight

Roof Building for Shingles Awareness #NextBigCharityChallenge @midnight

Now that the media has been kicked out, back to our normal everyday lives of ignoring reality. #Ferguson #FreedomOfPress

#OneDirectionAlbumLeaked : Well, I guess we better put the boys back in diapers.

You’ve Got Ghost #SupernaturalRomComs @midnight

10 Things I Hate About Boo #SupernaturalRomComs @midnight

The 40-Year-Old Vampire #SupernaturalRomComs @midnight

Psychic-Drunk Love #SupernaturalRomComs @midnight

Poltergeist In Pink #SupernaturalRomComs @midnight

Slenderman In Seattle #SupernaturalRomComs @midnight

Sixteen Candelabras #SupernaturalRomComs @midnight

It Happened One Black Knight #SupernaturalRomComs @midnight

The Purple Ghost of Cairo #SupernaturalRomComs @midnight

(500) Days of Summermaids #SupernaturalRomComs @midnight

His Girl Friday the 13th #SupernaturalRomComs @midnight

Chasing Bigfoot #SupernaturalRomComs @midnight

Bridget Jones’s Dhampirs #SupernaturalRomComs @midnight

Werewolf and Maude #SupernaturalRomComs @midnight

Four Warlocks and a Funeral #SupernaturalRomComs @midnight

Slay Anything #SupernaturalRomComs @midnight

The Princess Corpse Bride #SupernaturalRomComs @midnight

When Fairy Met Sally #SupernaturalRomComs @midnight

Witch Perfect #SupernaturalRomComs @midnight

Mermaid In Manhattan #SupernaturalRomComs @midnight

American Psy #SupernaturalRomComs @midnight

Warlock of Ages #SupernaturalRomComs @midnight

There’s Something About Mary Shelley #SupernaturalRomComs @midnight

Banshee’s Just Not That Into You #SupernaturalRomComs @midnight

Deconstructing Fairy #SupernaturalRomComs @midnight

Bigfoot Loose #SupernaturalRomComs @midnight

Fast Times at Ridgemont Psy #SupernaturalRomComs @midnight

50 First Wraiths #SupernaturalRomComs @midnight

Hex and the City #SupernaturalRomComs @midnight

2.6 million children starve to death every year. You think god cares about your grades. Even Helen Keller didn’t have blind faith like that.

Knocked down every fighter. Destroyed every torpedo plane and bomber before they dropped their loads. Still lost Pearl Harbor. #GameLogic

CAPTION CENTRAL:

Mmm..... balls.

Mmm….. balls.

When you absolutely, positively, must be prepared for the paparazzi.

When you absolutely, positively, must be prepared for the paparazzi.

When the man you're dating just won't get the hint and make a move...

When the man you’re dating just won’t get the hint and make a move…

Aww, the Holy Grail rabbits are all growed up!

Aww, the Holy Grail rabbits are all growed up!

Because nothing says "I Love Jesus" more than crosses on your leggings and underwear!

Because nothing says “I Love Jesus” more than crosses on your leggings and underwear!

WE'RE ALL GONNA DIE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

WE’RE ALL GONNA DIE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Trust me ladies when I tell you that this guy has crabs.

Trust me ladies when I tell you that this guy has crabs.

How many times do I have to warn all of you to constantly be aware of your surroundings?

How many times do I have to warn all of you to constantly be aware of your surroundings?

Meanwhile, in Kansas...

Meanwhile, in Kansas…

20140818: Shelf Chasing in Moore’s Mill, AL

Storms came into the Northern Alabama area and of course I was working. I missed the best ones, but I did go chase during my lunch. I got a few lightning shots and chased a shelf. The shelf was gorgeous, but it was a weak shelf with little lightning, no wind, and only moderate rain. I threw together a quick video of the shelf chase:

I also threw together a GIF of one of the lightning strikes I caught near my house before I chased the shelf:

20140818 Animated GIF 001 (250ms)