Independence Day: Resurgence (Quick Review, No Spoilers)

Independence Day: Resurgence
Quick Review (No Spoilers)

So we finally got to see ID4R. Before I start a non-spoiler quick review, let me say that regardless of the review, it was well worth seeing in the theater.

That being said…

The attempt at the campy style of the first movie was mildly successful. I laughed a few times, giggled a few times, and grimaced at the awful attempt a few times as well.

Bringing so many of the original characters back reminded me of Bruce Willis in Die Hard 2 (one too many) saying, “How can the same shit happen to the same guy twice?” Throw in the mediocre acting in some scenes and the good acting in others, and it was hard to make the connection to the characters that we had with them in the first movie.

There’s also a very strange appearance by someone who was killed in ID4. All that I’ll say in order to not give anything away is that his miraculous recovery is never explained. But I’m also being an overly critical nitpicker with this one if I’m being fair. After all, it is FICTION.

The movie is CGI heavy. Sometimes that could be a bad thing, but the CGI makes this movie and honestly saves it: this is why it is worth seeing on the big screen, even with all its faults (and good stuff too).

Suzie made a comment just a few minutes in, “So this is going to be Top Gun in space?”

She wasn’t that far off the mark. As President Whitmore puts on his flight suit again, I kept waiting for his daughter (Patricia, remember her from ID4?) to say, “Negative Ghostrider, the pattern is full.”

David Levinson in ID4 used a line from Jurassic Park, and it could have been his “I’ll be back” moment in ID4R, but I guess they thought it was too campy? Which is weird since they went “too campy” a few times. I hope in the BluRay they add, “Must go faster. Must go faster! Must go faster! Go, go, go, go!” while David’s driving the bus.

At the end of the movie I wanted to shout, “I could’ve been at a barbecue! But I ain’t mad.”

All that said, seriously, go see it on the big screen. Your TV won’t do it justice (yes, even your 66” TV, you technologically spoiled brat).

BWAHAHA 1/31 – 2/6

BWAHAHA (Blair’s Week Attempts at Haha’s) 1/31 – 2/6: Mostly a boring week for me. I have no car since my windshield is still shattered from the basketball goal that fell on it, so I’m a captive in my own home. But since I don’t have any money thanks to a giant electric bill, that’s probably a good thing. Hey, at least I’m kicking ass on Skyrim (playing from scratch for the tenth time).

I’m still disappointed in the Seahawks’ Super Bowl loss. I don’t care how many times the coach explains why he chose to throw the ball, it was still a bad call when you had at least one more down (barring any penalties on the Pat’s side) to try to get Marshawn (or at least a QB sneak) that one fucking yard! What’s done is done, sure, but fuck the Patriots.

OTHER STUFF:

• Coming down from the DJ booth, I missed the last step and fell. I’m so gonna feel it in the morning. #ClubLife

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  Google finally has a an up-to-date pic of my house (fire pit & Rondo visible). But WTF is that shiny shit?

• If you’re a Christian, shouldn’t you support gay marriage? After all, the more gay couples getting married, the sooner Jesus will come back!
• More people are flying their own drones, so UFO reports should go up. And a UFO report is just admitting your inability to ID the common. Like this drone, it’s sure to get some UFO reports.
• Feeling brave? I can legally perform marriages in the state of Alabama.

140 CHARACTER ASSASSINATIONS:

• I’m in a room full of 13 men all hoping for a Katy Perry wardrobe malfunction. #SB49
• Katy Perry is wearing a flaming Hunger Games dress. #SB49 #HalftimeShow
• Those Beach balls are not deflated. #SB49 #HalftimeShow
• When did Missy Elliott become a NASCAR driver? #SB49 #HalftimeShow
• Wow, look at all those blue balls on the field. #SB49 #HalftimeShow
• Man that sucks, but at least we got a UFC fight at the end. #SB49
• There is only one question I have. #WhyDidTheyThrowTheBall

@MIDNIGHT #HASSHTAGWARS:

• Alabama jumped from 49th to 50th dumbest state #BecauseIDied @midnight
• @midnight ‪#‎BecauseIDied‬ I got a huge break on my carbon credits.
• @midnight ‪#‎BecauseIDied‬ I’ll never see all of the Internet.
• @midnight ‪#‎BecauseIDied‬ the cats only survived for three more weeks.
• @midnight ‪#‎BecauseIDied‬ the Seattle Seahawks won the Super Bowl. Oh wait, I’m still alive.
• @midnight ‪#‎BecauseIDied‬ the 2016 Republican Presidential candidate will win by one vote.
• @midnight ‪#‎BecauseIDied‬ Jesus was like, “Screw it, make ’em wait another 2,000+ years.”
• @midnight ‪#‎BecauseIDied‬ God became an atheist.
• @midnight ‪#‎BecauseIDied‬ the Cult of Namira had a week-long banquet. ‪#‎Skyrim‬
• @midnight ‪#‎BecauseIDied‬ I didn’t see Martial Law declared so that Obama could have a Third Term.
• @midnight ‪#‎BecauseIDied‬ my guns are now in less-responsible hands: the police.
• @midnight ‪#‎BecauseIDied‬ everyone attending my funeral has to listen to Enjoy the Silence by Depeche Mode (ironically) for two hours on loop.
• @midnight ‪#‎BecauseIDied‬ I won’t see Star Wars XLIX: Red Zone Force
• @midnight ‪#‎BecauseIDied‬ I can now haunt Fred Phelps with taunts of “God hates nags.”
• @midnight ‪#‎BecauseIDied‬ I found Waldo and Carmen Sandiego: they’re sitting next to me in Hell.

CAPTION CENTRAL:

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  1. The 1 driver you’ll let cut you off. 2. The 1 driver you don’t want to have road rage. 3. He can run a red light.

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  And here I was thinking the Fast & Furious series CGI’d all their stunts.

• 

  Ever since re-releasing GTA5 on PS4, shit like this has started again. GTA5 or Real Life?

Into the Storm: A Review (Sort of)

Into the Storm

I watched Into the Storm Friday night in Huntsville, Alabama.

There has been a lot of criticism online about the science in Into the Storm. I do not get that criticism. If you want accurate science then watch a documentary on The Science Channel. To the critics of the science, you do realize you are watching a work of fiction, right? It’s called fiction because it’s NOT MOTHERFUCKING REAL!!!!

To be fair, there was some accurate science in the movie (perhaps 60% or so) and some relatively accurate scenes. But again, that is irrelevant because it’s a work of fiction, as in not reality.

The cast of the movie is almost all unknown actors and actresses, except Rick’s Wife. You know, Rick’s Wife, from The Walking Dead. It’s hard to really say she’s known since everyone knows her as Rick’s Wife from The Walking Dead, who is dead and no longer on the series. She doesn’t even appear as a figment of Rick’s imagination anymore. However, given that she is an experienced actress, she did do the best acting.

Essentially this movie plays like a SyFy Original, but better than a SyFy Original. This isn’t Sharknado or Megaduck Versus Platysharktocrock. It plays like a SyFy Original because it’s all unknown actors, and you know it pretty quickly. However, that’s not really meant to be a knock of the movie: all the unknown actors do a pretty decent job. For example, when the kids are making the video before they’re about to drown, you’ll actually well up a bit if you have any decent about of humanity in you. That scene is in the trailer, so I didn’t spoil anything, so quit being a weenie and shut up.

The CGI of the tornadoes is really good. It’s so good that I have to wonder if someone didn’t invent the software for CGI tornadoes and then someone decided to make a movie around the CGI instead of the other way around. When you have this new awesome CGI effect, you have to show it off and up the ante a bit, so the tornado goes through fire and creates a firenado, which is really beautiful and looked very similar to an actual fire whirl. That also means you have to put multiple tornadoes on the ground at once, but to do that you have to violate the science and have four of them in close proximity for camera view, and science criticism begins in 3… 2… 1… (Oh shut up, you purist, and just enjoy the show). Although I have to admit, I’m still trying to figure out why this small town in Oklahoma had a major international airport with giant airplanes that could be swept into the air and explode… but I forgave them of that because it was awesome (no spoilers, that was in the trailer to you big baby).

The movie has its funny moments and comic relief where needed (especially the redneck chasers). Most of it is timed well, some of it not, but that’s actually more than can be said about most movies that try to inject humor into drama and action.

The bottom line is that I was entertained and enjoyed myself. Maybe more so because I’m a storm chaser and likely injected a bit of confirmation bias during my viewing of it (yes, I wore my Alabama Storm Chasers t-shirt to the screening). If you want to see action, shit blow up, tornadoes, cars and buildings fly and get torn apart, and really good special effects, then watch this movie. If you’re a scientific purist who freaks out when anything is wrong in a work of MOTHERFUCKING FICTION, then you should stay home and lock yourself in your room to be safe from the real world and all forms of entertainment that violate physics. We’ll all be better off for it.

I give Into the Storm 3 out of 5 stars.

 

 

 

 

Watch the trailer: