BWAHAHA 12/20 – 12/26:

BWAHAHA (Blair’s Week Attempts at Haha’s) 12/20 – 12/26: My GF stumbled upon one of the best written articles I’ve ever seen written about white privilege for white people – by a white person. Remember, privilege isn’t an insult or a bad word. What’s important is that you recognize that you have it and more importantly, that others do not have it (be that white, male, class, etc). Read the article HERE.

So this week was Christmas. I’m one of those atheists who celebrates Christmas. Why? Because no one goes to the mall to sit on Jesus’ lap, that’s why. So what’d you get for Christmas? My friends and my GF got me a lot of stuff I’ll need for the Zombiepocalypse (or camping) and plenty of vaping stuff. I got a tactical vest, tactical leg pouch, 9-in-1 shovel (it comes with a fucking bayonet!), 35-LED light stick, three 10-LED head lamps, camp stove, Aspire Atlantis tank (and five replacement coils), a gift certificate to Professor Vapes (located in Madison, AL), a full body massage at the Chinese Massage place in Huntsville, and a new cutlery set for my kitchen. I did pretty damn good this Christmas!

My friends and I watched The Interview this week (no spoilers, I promise). There were some pretty good laughs throughout the movie. If you are one of my fellow liberals who was worried about a movie showing an assassination of a sitting leader, you should actually watch the movie. It’s not what you expect. I won’t spoil it, just watch it and stop jumping to the wrong conclusions. The Interview has tons of in-your-face and hidden social commentary about diplomacy, foreign policy, media, etc. The Interview is social commentary wrapped in comedy and slapstick. Don’t let the terrorists win! Watch The Interview!

I did get to do a little bit of storm chasing this week, but Alabama proved to be frustrating as always when it comes to chasing storms. At least I got to test out the new AcuRite. It’s designed to mount in your backyard, but I mounted it on the roof of my car. Worked like a champ! Thanks AcuRite!

OTHER STUFF:

• Out and about and I left my wallet at home. Guess I’m not eating or accomplishing anything. #EarlyAlzheimers
• Thanks to Old Time Pottery, I have more glitter on me than Tinker Bell.
• Some Christmas music I actually like!
• Chasing in Alabama is frustrating. If the cell doesn’t dissipate, trees block the view or farmer John holds up traffic.
• Something to do on the next camping trip… and by trip… I mean acid trip.
• Normally we go eat Chinese buffet on Christmas Day with friends. But we found out that Indian Palace is open today! Yep, that trumps Chinese!

• 

  Who ordered the rain donut?

140 CHARACTER ASSASSINATIONS:

• Tripster: a hipster in training.
• Mutant: someone who participates in a mutiny.
• Kumquats are amazing. It’s like a pear and a tangerine had sex.
• At Joe Cocker’s funeral, you can leave your hat on. #RIPJoeCocker
• Thanks to smart phones, awkward silences aren’t that awkward anymore.

CAPTION CENTRAL:

• 

  I can’t tell… is she keeping his hand warm or is he keeping her butt warm? Or is it more a symbiotic relationship?

• 

  Do you even hack, bro?!?!

• 

  Stand back! I’m about to try a physics experiment!

BWAHAHA: 12/7 – 12/13

BWAHAHA (Blair’s Week Attempts at Haha’s) 12/7 – 12/13: I traveled to Florida this week to help my Dad move for his divorce. The day we leave I find out he’s reconciled and we’re going down to move all the stuff. Fickle bastard.  Then he ended up in the hospital… but that’s next week’s BWAHAHA.

12/7

Life is like a juice box: you don’t know how empty it is until you’re sucking on the last of it.

12/9

Sarah Palin, “Atheists are trying to abort Christ from Christmas.” Distraction working since we’re trying to abort Christ in general.

12/10

Make a book-based movie and viewers complain, “It wasn’t like the book!” Make it like the book and you get, “It’s too long and boring!”
Or “There’s too much walking!”

I think white Jesus may live in Tifton, GA. At least that was the impression I got from all the billboards with his picture on them.

12/11

I’ve already been greeted by a half naked woman pacing in the parking lot. Thank you Florida.

Life is like a vibrator: it can bring pleasure or pain, be gentle or rough, but ultimately the batteries die.

During the Happy Holidays, suicide rates go up. If you’re gonna go… go Happy!

I would say I’m bored off my ass, but I’m sitting on it, so I’m more bored on my ass.

My suicide note will read, “I did not commit suicide. I accidentally hung myself.” #LifeInsuranceStrategies

Oh no, I forgot to lock the shark cage and fell into the shark’s mouth! #LifeInsuranceStrategies

Uh-oh, I was driving too fast and accidentally drove off this 1,000 foot cliff into the an active volcano! #LifeInsuranceStrategies

12/12

Why is our culture afraid of young black men? Watching COPS we should be afraid of rednecks.

12/13

For a religion of homophobia, Christians certainly have a very homoerotic relationship with their Jesus.

That was a really tough conference call:

Blog Entry: Interesting License Plate

There’s only one way to solve the argument over the race of Santa Claus:

It never ceases to amaze me how easy it is to identify a FOX News viewer just from the stupid shit coming out of their mouth.